"There was definitely strangeness going on," Cassie said. "Though, at the time, I was convinced it was a completely different, and more ordinary, kind of strangeness."
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Willow Creek, 2000
Bella was being weird.
Don't get me wrong, I still thought she was overprotective and hypercritical. She was still disappearing at all hours of the day and night, ostensibly for work. We still argued about almost everything.
However, she was suddenly completely supportive of Gwen coming over to study. Even weirder, she seemed very interested in Gwen - in her background and her family, but also in her thoughts, hopes and worries. I admit I might have been a little jealous, but her sudden interest seemed to extend to me too.
The next weekend things got even stranger.
It was Edwards' day off and, you might recall, he'd made plans to join Mr. Brown and his friends fishing. Hoping that I had enough good will from Bella, I asked if I could go along.
"Of course," Bella said with a smile. "In fact, if you don't think anyone would mind, Edwards, I'd like to join you as well."
"You... you want to come fishing ma'am?" Edwards managed to sound both shocked and polite with the same breath.
"Well, no," Bella admitted. "I was hoping to catch up a little with Lilian. It's been ages since we got together."
Excited as I was about getting to go over to Gwen's, the idea of my elegant stepmother hanging out with the bohemian artist Mrs. Brown almost made me laugh out loud. Still, neither Edwards nor I were willing to argue with Bella about it.
"Of course, ma'am. You're most welcome, I'm sure," Edwards smiled nervously.
"Bella," Mrs. Brown greeted us with obvious surprise. "I wasn't expecting you. You look... well, amazing."
Honestly, until that day I don't think I'd known she even owned a pair of jeans. (Edwards, always discrete, had managed to run off and join the guys fishing in the canal almost as soon as we arrived.)
Gwen gave me an even-more-perplexed-than-usual look.
I was excited enough about spending the afternoon with her, outside of school, that even Bella's presence wasn't going to bother me.
We made a beeline for Gwen's room, leaving Bella and Mrs. Brown making small talk.
Bella seemed so completely comfortable, dressed in casual clothes I'd never imagined her wearing, hanging out in that little house, chatting amiably about art with Mrs. Brown. I remember thinking to myself - 'who is this woman, and what did she do with my stepmother?'
Of course, alone with Gwen, I quickly forgot about Bella's weird behavior. Although, searching for something, anything, to talk about, I latched onto Bella's topic, and we started chatting about art. I found myself asking Gwen about her artistic process. What she told me would soon change my life in the most unexpected ways.
"I start by Centering," Gwen said. "It's something Grandmother taught me when I was little. She would say 'Feel the wind, blowing over you. Listen to the water, flowing by. Smell the green grass as it grows. Be warmed by the Sun and touch the memories of the Moon.'"
"That's cool," I said, feeling oddly moved. "So, it's like a meditation."
"Similar," Gwen mused. "For me, meditation is about silence and stillness. Centering is about connecting and moving, creating and changing."
"What do you think?" she asked, showing me her new painting.
"It's different," I said. "It's... warm and... it's about connecting, isn't it."
"I'm glad you like it," Gwen smiled, and I felt warm and connected too.
Yeah, I felt good about my friendship with Gwen and that made me feel good about life in general. I decided that Bella was just being decent, wanting to get to know my friend. Maybe, I thought, she was even trying to make up for her overreaction to me going over to Gwen's that day.
Then, a few days later, came the museum trip.
Gwen was doing advanced art classes, you see, because of course she was. As a class assignment, she had to visit the local art museum and analyze some paintings. Mrs. Brown was taking her and they asked if I wanted to join them.
I wasn't even surprised Bella invited herself along again.
I admit, before Gwen, I was all about music. I didn't know much about art, and I'd never been to the museum before (except maybe for some elementary school trip when I was little).
Of course, Willow Creek was all about music and especially about jazz. So, I probably shouldn't have been surprised when Gwen led to me paintings about music.
"You can hear it, can't you," she said, looking at the painting. "Like the music is caught in the brush strokes."
Looking at the painting with her, I almost could.
Even as I looked at the painting, I caught a bit of conversation behind us.
"It's not that she's difficult," Mrs. Brown was saying. "I think I could handle 'difficult.' She does her schoolwork and her chores without complaint. Actually, she's always very quick about her chores. I swear, I'll leave the room and come back moments later to find everything clean and Gwen reading a book. I don't know how she does it."
"But?" Bella promoted.
"Well, she's usually very polite and very quiet," Mrs. Brown said, "but I worry about her, Bella. You know she's been through something terrible, but she won't talk about it. I think she has nightmares... she hardly seems to sleep. I'll hear her up at all hours of the night. Sometimes, she barely eats. She has these... outbursts... startling at nothing, becoming totally panicked, then a moment later she's calm as a lake. Doug says she'll talk when she's ready, but I worry she needs more help than we're giving her. I just wish she'd open up to me."
"You know if you, or Doug, need anything, Mortimer and I are here for you," Bella said.
"We really appreciate that, Bella," Mrs. Brown replied.
"And if you're worried about Gwen, I may know some people who can help," Bella added. "The company I work for has a lot of resources. I'm sure I could get you a recommendation or referral to specialists."
"Oh, I don't know," Mrs. Brown said. "I'm sure Doug's right and we just need to give her time... but I'll keep it in mind."
What was Bella up to, I thought indignantly. OK, Gwen was a little odd and could have a strange turn sometimes, but she wasn't ready for a straitjacket and a rubber room or anything.
As we said out goodbyes outside the museum, I found myself suddenly suspicious.
Was Bella up to something sinister? Did all those questions she asked Gwen, about her past and her feelings, have some hidden agenda? Had she invited herself along, over the weekend and to the museum, just to get closer to Mrs. Brown, and through her to find out more about Gwen?
Why?
One thing I knew for sure - Gwen was my best friend and if Bella tried to do anything to come between us, she was going to fail!
